Po Bastard's Guinness and Lentil Soup

Po' Bastard made this hefty soup earlier this evening. The inspiration came from a wee booklet of Irish Stout recipes-- this was originally a vegetable side dish including a leek and three carrots.
Po' Bastard's kitchen, being leekless, and Po' Bastard, being too lazy to peel and dice three carrots, turned it into a simple, hefty soup. Warning: Not for wimpy bitches.

Ingredients:
-250 grams red split lentils
-2 cups beef broth
-580 ml Guinness (that's two cups plus some extra-- get two large cans, or else the largest bottle of Guinness you can buy)
--salt and pepp
--1 tbsp. dried parsley
--many dashes balsamic vinegar
--4 tbsp. brown sugar

Method:
Dissolve the broth cube in the water. When it comes to a boil, dump in the lentils, the Guinness, and all the seasoning. Bring the entire mix to the boil, then turn it to a low heat. Cover and simmer for at least an hour until the lentils have pureed themselves, stirring periodically to see if you need to add more liquid-- you could add more Guinness, or water (like Po' B did), or probably even more broth, if you have it.

Notes:
In Ireland, we have a thick wheaty bread that's served with most soups. Something brown and dense would be my first choice. I'd have to go that route for the ideal beverage, too-- you know, just for flavor continuity (nothing to do with overwhelming desire to drink heavily-- Ireland just does that to people).

I suppose you could add a few other vegetables to the soup for color, but who cares about color. Sometimes we want to eat brown stuff to feel closer to the earth and all that hippie-shit.

Famous People who could eat this:
-Ice-T
-LL Cool J
-Lemont Dobson, Viking Emperor
-Evan